Stop reading my motto!
Largest Agricultural Sector: 1st Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 4th Most Ignorant Citizens: 51st
The Eternal Misfortune of
Corrupt Dictatorship
Civil Rights
Below Average
Political Freedom

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population5.411 billion


The Eternal Misfortune of Aqualagoon is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its rampant corporate plagiarism, smutty television, and feral children. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 5.411 billion Aqualagoonians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The tiny, corrupt, well-organized government is effectively ruled by the Department of Industry, with Welfare and Healthcare not funded at all. The average income tax rate is 6.2%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Aqualagoonian economy, worth 813 trillion Raindrops a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, highly specialized black market in Beef-Based Agriculture and Trout Farming. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 150,303 Raindrops, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Politicians accepting drinks in bars are executed for taking bribes, one does not simply walk into the tundra, 100-year-old politicians are now a thing of the past, and the new national mascot has to be wheeled onto the field of play. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Aqualagoon's national animal is the Trout, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Aqualagoon is ranked 80,798th in the world and 3,719th in the South Pacific for Most Extreme, scoring 18.67 on the Paul-Nader Subjective Decentrality Index.

Largest Agricultural Sector: 1stLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 4thMost Ignorant Citizens: 51stHighest Crime Rates: 99thMost Armed: 106thMost Primitive: 130thMost Devout: 219thMost Rebellious Youth: 480thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 559thMost Subsidized Industry: 695thBest Weather: 1,011thNudest: 1,286thMost Corrupt Governments: 1,402ndTop
Most Avoided: 1,949thLargest Black Market: 3,288thHighest Disposable Incomes: 3,531stFattest Citizens: 3,634thHighest Poor Incomes: 6,554thMost Efficient Economies: 7,261stLowest Overall Tax Burden: 7,792ndTop
Most Beautiful Environments: 12,035thHighest Average Incomes: 12,766thRudest Citizens: 13,075thMost Stationary: 14,623rdHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 15,449th
Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 6th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 7th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 7th in the regionMost Armed: 7th in the regionMost Devout: 8th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 17th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 19th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 24th in the regionMost Avoided: 29th in the regionNudest: 30th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 32nd in the regionBest Weather: 37th in the regionLargest Black Market: 58th in the regionTop
Highest Disposable Incomes: 77th in the regionFattest Citizens: 80th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 147th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 180th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 282nd in the regionMost Stationary: 293rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 322nd in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 325th in the regionRudest Citizens: 349th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 371st in the regionTop
Largest Populations: 423rd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 462nd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 757th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Aqualagoon was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Lowest Overall Tax Burden and the Top 10% for Highest Unexpected Death Rate.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, the new national mascot has to be wheeled onto the field of play.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, 100-year-old politicians are now a thing of the past.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, one does not simply walk into the tundra.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, politicians accepting drinks in bars are executed for taking bribes.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, the nation's once beautiful countryside has turned brown as farmers spray potent pesticides.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, awkward tourists are offered the 'unique experience' of rodeo clown.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, the government is spending millions to provide full health care for all citizens.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, pet loving officers arrest citizens who don't give their dogs enough biscuits.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, one of the nation's leading exports is empty platitudes.


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