The Incorporated States of Andes Mountains is a massive, orderly nation, notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, restrictive gun laws, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 1.113 billion Andesians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The tiny, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bert. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 7.2%.

The powerhouse Andes Mountainsian economy, worth 107 trillion Bananas a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is 96,290 Bananas, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 686,762 per year while the poor average 4,439, a ratio of 154 to 1.

Emojis are the soul of wit, police officers that upset their bosses get assigned to 24 hour stakeouts of bike sheds, tourists call Andes Mountainsian beach towns "the fine coastline", and children often explain to their parents that the Mega Ultimate Sword Fist was worth the thousand-Banana charge on their phone bill. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, thanks to a capable police force. Andes Mountains's national animal is the Dollar, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Andes Mountains is ranked 170,168^th in the world and 7,411^th in Osiris for Lowest Crime Rates, with 59.29 law-abiding acts per hour.